HN: What are the effects of debt on your life?

Many people feel the way you describe. You can find all kinds of support groups for people who feel burdened by debt.

I went through the same thing -- mortgage I couldn't afford, kids, credit cards, car loans. I remember feeling crushed by the debt and responsibility, and having to work at jobs I didn't like so I could pay the bills. That happened through a series of my own poor decisions and mistaking "want" with "need," and I succumbed to family and social pressure to do the expected thing, to strive for the American Dream. I coped by knowing almost everyone else had the same problems (or worse). I looked forward to a life without debt eventually. The kids grew up and moved out, I sold the house, got everything paid off. Now I have no debt, travel full-time and live in hotels and short-term rentals, and only use credit cards to get the points.

The usual advice comes down to controlling your spending and paying off your debts as fast as you can. For severe debt problems you can look into bankruptcy for a fresh start. Life doesn't last long enough to spend most of it working mainly to pay off debt.

Sorry, can't give advice that would help on any level - I can only offer my sympathy.

When I was in university, I maxed out my student-loan (though granted, it wasn't as high as student loans in the US, but still a relatively hefty sum). It felt forever to pay it back (though actually it took maybe 6 or 7 years?), and felt like I was shackled and couldn't move. Anyway, that was the first and last time I got myself a loan. Ever since I haven't bought anything that I couldn't pay in cash from my pocket, and even if I have to live under the bridge, I won't make the same mistake of getting a loan again.

I treat the mortgage as rent with the benefit that the asset value goes to me and not the landlord. So when I get the job+responsibilities blues I try to improve on those rather than the mortgage.

I bought my first home in 1983 for £29.500 with a 5% deposit.

This was a small, two bedroom, end of terrace property ideal for a single man. 25 miles outside London as I could not afford to buy any property near where I worked.

My financial adviser told me that the interest on this mortgage would be £160,000 over the 25 year mortgage term.

forward 42 years and that same property is on the market today for £360,000.

If I still lived there and intended to sell. Where could I move unless I increased the mortgage. Every other house has also gone up in value.

If you take the £160,000 from the £360,000 it appears that I would have made some £200,000 profit. At least this is what the banks and estate agents tell you. But this money is meaningless. I cannot use that money to buy a new car or have a 6 months holiday. I would have to sell my home and become homeless.

The tories namely Margaret Thatcher destroyed society but selling off all the social housing where families for generations lived successful and fulfilling lives.

Who actually benefits from buying your own home? The rich, the banks, the estate agents and money lenders.

My dad told me at the time that I would carrying a ball and chain for the rest of my life.

My son still lives at home aged 35. We worked out that to buy my first home in todays climate he would have to be earning as a basic salary £120,000 per annum. He earns about £50,000 per annum, which is double the average income in the UK, and he still cannot even afford a tiny end of terrace home for himself and any future family. He also has a £40,000 debt from his degree.

He will eventually inherit a home but if I live until I am 90 years old he will be nearly retired but that time.

The wonders of Capitalism.